Spiritual aspects
of ageing
It is generally recognised
that there are three broad elements in a person’s spiritual life:
1.
Participate in organised
religious ritual practices and activities
2.
Engage in private
religious devotion, meditation or reflection
3.
Engage in a daily life
that exhibits a continuing religious or spiritual experience.
These are not mutually
exclusive. Some people will ‘go to church on
Sunday’, or not go to church but be independently ‘worshipful’, or
live a good ‘Christian’ life without engaging in the other two
activities.
And, of course,
maybe your friend is not religious but has their own spirituality.
If we use some gentle exploring questions we will find out a little
of their spirituality. It may well be, for example, that they
receive their comfort from a non-religious source. If that is the
case, we cannot pass judgement on our
friend.
However, we should be
willing to help a person find peace and comfort through the
Scriptures if we are asked but, if we are not, we respect the
person’s own wishes.
Your friend may be unable to attend religious meetings may rely on you to provide spiritual help.
They will often like to
pray; and,
They will often like to
reminisce about church activities or family activities.
You might consider that
if you are visiting them, your
presence can often be the only spiritual association they have
during a week, especially if they are isolated.
They look forward to your
visit;
Despite their isolation
they continue to grow spiritually; and,
They can become excited
at the prospect of the realisation of their Christian hope of
eternal life.
It is the constant stimulus
of things that give them peace and comfort that help them towards
the
latter end of their life.
The ageing process has a
way of facilitating spiritual growth because of loss, pain and
suffering.
Such events may be a
catalyst that leads to a renewed faith.
In a crisis, people tend
to move towards rather than away from God.
Listen to their story.
Here are some more questions
you might find useful in exploring for yourself the spiritual state
of your friend (or any ill person, for that matter).
Warning: Please be careful that the use of such questions
doesn’t appear to be intrusive.
You might also
restrict yourself to just one or two of these questions, depending
on how they respond.
How are you feeling about
this within yourself?
When you want to feel
strength, where do you go, who do you see?
When you want to feel
strength and comfort, what do you think of?
Who would you like to see
more of? What is it that they bring to you? How would seeing them be
good for you?
What sustains you (or,
keeps you going) most at the moment?
When have you felt loved,
guided and supported in a most wholesome way?
When do you feel
connection and compassion for other lives?
Is forgiveness a part of
your life, forgiveness of both yourself and others?
Anger – ‘You are not fair, God. I lived a good
life. Why this?’
Acceptance – Considerable
physical disability but smiles gently at a visitor.
Avoidance – a bad
prognosis. The person sits in a chair all day and pretends to be
asleep if someone comes near.
Transformation – after a
vigorous life, and despite extreme difficulty, the person has
changed, of necessity, to a more sedentary life.
